Full Moon

 

I had the craziest dream last night. I was at Featherbrook and both of my instructors were there but instead of riding lessons they were coaching and we were playing soccer. It was all of the young girls that ride at my barn and we were scrimmaging and playing some simple keep away. I could sense in my dream my bad knee as well as the huge bruise on my shin I got last sunday from slipping down the stairs outside. I remember feeling insecure and embarrassed about how my ball skills had deteriorated after not having played for so long and being injured. One of the younger girls didn’t want to play and ran away crying and I remember leaving the scrimmage and talking her into playing again. They threw a ball at me in the air and I had to trap it with my foot to start the drill and I remember trying to yell out and make light of the fact that I’m old now and can’t trap a ball like a youngin’. But really it just made me feel inadequate. Actually, that’s how I feel every time I talk about soccer. It has nothing to do with my playing skills, I managed a fairly accurate understanding of my skills and weaknesses. But it does have plenty to do with unfinished business. But I digress… This dream was an interesting juxtaposition of my old life and my new life; memories and aspirations. Who knows what it means, if anything. I do know that horses are the only thing that makes the painful memories not hurt so bad. I am so thankful I am able to have them in my life.

swl

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